I’m Not the Hero
A couple of weeks ago, we had a church service with some extra songs and written prayers. One of the prayers was focused on repentance and remembering to orient our lives towards God. And during that time I was reminded that I am not the center of the story.
It’s an important part of Christianity that everything we have done has been made small by what Christ has done. I’m not the hero of this story. I spend too much of my life walking around like someone is filming a movie and I’m the star. When I get stuck in this selfish view, I end up judging myself by what I do and what I accomplish. I overestimate my own ability to control situations and end up upset with myself when things don’t work out the way I thought they should.
In this self-centered thinking, even humility can get caught up in thinking about how to act and say things humbly, how to do humility, when a big part of what humility can teach is just remembering that it’s not all about me. This isn’t about my plan. Instead, I should keep my focus on being the way God has called me to be.
A lot of times I do not get to make things happen. I am just one part of my family, not the author of everything we do. My actions are not the only contributor to whether a family meal succeeds or an outing fails. All I get to do is respond to what happens in a loving way.
There is a comfort in checking in with reality, spending a little time remembering how small we are, thinking about the mystery of a great and loving God, the creator of a huge universe. We are just a tiny part of something big. I am just one part of the movement of God.